A Life

A weekly podcast about asexuality

A Life #64: Gender Repulsion

Download (MP3)

Feeling repulsed by your own gender is a theme that seems to come up pretty often in the asexual community. Gender repulsion goes beyond “simple” genital repulsion, since it encompasses other parts of your body as well as the societal norms and expectations placed on you because of your physical sex. This is what the rather small crew of A Life discusses this time around.

Are you repulsed by your own gender?


July 17, 2011 - Posted by | Podcast


  1. Kiva kuunnella suomalaisia puhumassa englantia. Great show, I think I’m going to start listening to you a little more.

    Comment by useless | July 22, 2011

  2. Like Vlad I’m more inclined to identify as human than with my assigned gender. But lately I hold less of an opionion due to sexism and the social assignment of gender role playing. Now I’m in limbo between angry asexual and defeated man. I don’t care anymore. But I’m employed.

    [Soundbite] RE: Overpopulation
    The overpopulation issue is a nonsequitor. Outside of the institution of Economics, discussion of “there are too many people for earth to bear” speaken factually does not make sense.

    Though it is the genesis of the issue, economic reasoning about overpopulation is not resolute because it is a projection that is incomplete and flawed:

    Economics is a social science. And as a science it will produce irreducibly complex theories. The fact that it is social means economic studies accounts human feelings, behaviours, wants and needs; and as a science, it’s rigorous and strict, whittling away at any nonsense until it makes some sense…

    [Extended Detail]:
    Most of the time when we speak of the population issue it revolves around scarcity and biospheric degradation by humans. Meanwhile we tend to overlook the ideas the shape our perspective.

    The discussion of the imbalance between population, resources, and education imbalance losses authenticity outside the institutional scope of economics.

    Modern economics, dreamed up and perfected by cultures of the northern hemisphere, is a system that tries to conserve and keep tabs on earth’s resources and growth of humanity. For the most part, this is good, gathers particularly useful information about global activity.

    When we look at the issue with compassion and pragmatism, is when we see the extent to which we are ravaging the earth, taking advantage of each other, and being plain moronic.

    In a past podcast it was said and I’m paraphrasing “if the weather is too cold, DON’T LIVE THERE”. This unveils a great part of the solution. In earlier times, communities were smaller and made sensible decisions based on plausibility of interconnecting housing, agriculture, and social frameworks. Nowadays communities have grown and become less nomadic, and base decision on lofty ideas that are influenced by global economics; a system of management closely married to the financial system.

    At a personal level, this type of dualistic motivation produces a rational, usually informed or educated individual who in passing may voice, to borrow a quote from Louis CK, “wow, those children are dying in a nameless 4th-world nation as a direct result of me owning a diamond studded coffee-maker, and highend futuristic car with gold rims and heated seats”. And as I’ve observed, when an entire society of such individuals begin to think this way we end up with some rationalizing toward what is now the overpopulation issue.

    In my opinion, with influence from the thesis of Jared Diamond’s Guns Germs and Steel, the aforementioned sentiment is the correct emotion for a human. Now to extend that to an idea like there aren’t enough resources? I don’t think so. Look at the food waste, empty foreclosed houses, extravagant incomes, the obesity rates.

    I may be jumping trains of thought but there is enough resource and innovation for all communities to flourish. But in order for this to be actualized, monetarism has to be necessarily decoupled from community/nation-building. In this way, scarcity issues can be resolved through the actual social, technological, and environmental aptitudes of a given community. Without debt of nations, but instead with gratitude toward neighbors, other societies and nations who share ideas without looking for personal, usually monetary or strategic gain.

    Family planning is a fundamental part of the solution… But I’ll leave that topic for another time.

    Comment by raymo | July 26, 2011

  3. Thought people might be interested in seeing these two documentaries while were talking about the topic of gender….

    On youtube search:
    “The Boy Who Was Turned Into a Girl” and the follow up doco 4 years later, “Dr. Money And The Boy With No Penis” ….. Both about David Reimer who had his penis burnt off as a baby as was raised as a girl. He ended up killing himself a few years ago. Very Sad Story.

    Also Vlad everytime I listen to Jessie J – Sexy Silk I think of you and everytime I listen to Hate Everyone by Say Anything I think of Hendrick. Just thought you might find that interesting too.

    take care

    Comment by TheJester | August 20, 2011

  4. Make a new episooooooooooooode please! I miss it!

    Comment by B | September 1, 2011

  5. Yes, give us a new episode! This podcast is so much fun to listen to.

    On the topic of gender, I am completely agendered, and I dislike it when people confuse the terms “gender” and “sex”. It’s reassuring to hear other people with similar feelings on this topic. My genitals have nothing to do with my gender identity, but thanks for perpetuating this misconception, society. It makes me sad to live in a world where I’m granted unwarranted privilege simply because my genitals accorded me with a “male” gender identity at birth (although it is limited privilege if I am open about my queerness, which I am). The whole of my adolescence was spent rejecting the “maleness” of the culture that I am allegedly supposed to identify with – sometimes I wonder whether I only think this way because I am naturally contrary, but I don’t think so. I do not feel male and do not want to be male, but at the same time, I do not identify with the normative gender binary, so I have no compulsion to adopt “female” traits, either.

    In an earlier episode, Henrik was talking about his dislike for the term “single” as the default way of denoting the status of someone outside of a relationship. Can I propose using “hostile” as a better alternative?

    Comment by Seppooku | September 2, 2011

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